


A Comfort Only You Can Give

by inheritanceofgeek



Category: Fruits Basket, Fruits Basket - Takaya Natsuki (Manga)
Genre: Angst, Cuddling & Snuggling, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Mutual Pining, No beta we die like mne, Spoilers up to S214, unless you haven't been paying close attention to everything in which case up until Mid S3
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-10
Updated: 2020-07-10
Packaged: 2021-03-05 03:54:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,705
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25188268
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/inheritanceofgeek/pseuds/inheritanceofgeek
Summary: Kyo can hear Tohru’s mournful sobs coming from out of her room. As the sound grows worse he decides to go and see if there’s anything he can do to help and… well… everyone likes stroking a cat, right?
Relationships: Honda Tohru/Sohma Kyou
Comments: 16
Kudos: 105





	A Comfort Only You Can Give

**Author's Note:**

> This started out as something fluffy and then I ended up turning it into Angst… whoops? 
> 
> Watch me try to talk about how young Kyoko was when she married Katsuya without starting Katsuya discourse because... ahhhh... late 90s Manga. Amirite?

He tried his best to ignore the crying coming from the other side of the door. The issue was that, like the rest of the cursed Sohma, his hearing was on par with his animal spirit's. The same curse that gave him an allergy to chives and an intolerance to rain also gave him superior reflexes and improved senses. Funny that. 

He really had no place in interfering with Tohru's private time. Her room was one of the few places in the house that was hers alone. (The bathroom was meant to be hers too; but well… needs must sometimes.) It felt wrong to knock on her door and disturb her but… but could he really just leave her to cry all by herself without at least checking in?

Images from New Year's sprung up in his mind; of the shocked look on her tear stained face when they fell through the door. Her mother's portrait sat right in front of her as though it was all that kept her tethered to this world. 

He couldn't leave her like that again. He'd already caused her enough problems in her life. The crying sound suddenly stopped, replaced by the hitching breaths of someone trying and failing to gain control of themselves. He placed up and down for a moment, before ruffling his hair and letting out a deep groan. He sighed and obediently turned around and rapped on her door. 

"Hey, Tohru. It's me. You all right?" a stupid question really. But he didn't know how else to broach the subject. 

"Kyo-kun! Yes-- I'm-- I'm ummm--" came Tohru's spluttering voice. He then heard her scrabbling up from her bed and stumbling to the door. She opened it with a broad, fake smile. "Sorry about that Kyo-kun. What may I help you with?" 

Her eyes were still puffy and red from where she'd been rubbing at them with her damp sleeve. She'd not even managed to get changed out of her uniform. He looked above her head towards the rest of her room. Sure enough, there was her mother's portrait sitting right in the middle of her bed. 

"I think that's what I'm meant to be asking you." He said at last, suddenly completely unsure as to what to do with himself. He'd seen Tohru cry before, she was always one to turn on the waterworks whenever she felt any sort of emotion… but this was different; he could tell.

"Oh-- oh I'm fine Kyo-kun! No need to worry about me!" Tohru gave him one of her pretend smiles she put on to make everyone else happy. It fooled the rest of the world into seeing her as some ever-happy paper cut out of a girl; however Kyo knew her too well to ever fall for that facade. 

Leaning against the door frame, he fixed her with a serious look. "Yeah, no. That's bull shit. I heard you crying. I can see the tracks down your face and your eyes are all res. So obviously there's  _ something _ wrong. Do you want to talk about it?" he added a bit more gently. Her smile dropped and was replaced with yet more panic. 

"I'm-- I'm sorry Kyo-kun! I'm so very sorry, you must forgive me for being so loud I had no intention of disturbing you!" she bowed as if she were a puppet on a string forced to do it again and again. Kyo gave out a slow sigh and gently grabbed her shoulder to stop her before she gave herself a brain haemorrhage. 

"I told you before, Dummy, you don't have to pretend around me. If you've got problems, I'll listen to them. You don't have to fake it with me, okay? So-- so just tell me what the problem is. I wanna see your _ real _ smile again. Please, Tohru?" 

As if on cue, tears began to fill her eyes once more. The gentle brown seemed to glimmer all the brighter from it, and Kyo felt completely taken back by it. Her hands fisted in her skirt as she stood stock still for a moment, her head bowed down in misplaced shame. 

"It's nothing really. It's just… it's Mum's birthday next week. I set up my phone to give me reminders on such things, and I just-- I didn't want to-- but now I don't know what I'm meant to do at all." she let out a suppressed sob. "I'm meant to be happy. Birthdays are happy occasions and last year Uo and Hana and I celebrated together but this year I just-- I don't-- I'm not even sure if I  _ should _ do anything…" 

Kyo shifted from foot to foot, feeling a little uncomfortable about having such a private conversation in the middle of the hallway. He gave her a little sideways nod to ask permission to enter her room and she hurriedly moved aside to let him in. "Sit down, we'll talk this through, alright? Your feelings are justified, you're right to be upset, so tell me more, okay? Tell me everything you're feeling. Please?" 

Tohru looked like she was holding her breath as she stared up at him. Had she always been this small? He knew he'd undergone a growth spurt lately but standing next to her like this, she just seemed so vulnerable. Like she needed protecting. She gave him a small nod of understanding and moved to sit at the side of her bed, instinctively reaching out to her mother's picture as though it were a security blanket. Kyo sat beside her on the floor, looking up at her and waited for her to start speaking again. 

She stayed silent for a moment longer as she gathered her thoughts until at last she spoke in a small, uncertain voice. "She would have been thirty-six. Last year she was thirty-five. I can't help but think of all the jokes she'd be making, about being closer to forty than she was to thirty. How, maybe people would start believing her when she said she had a teenaged daughter… but then I think about what it actually means to be thirty-six. It's so young, when you think about it Kyo-kun. I hadn't really considered it before… 

"I-- I looked it up, and the average age of having a baby is thirty. But-- but she had me at nineteen. We're seventeen! My parents were married by now and-- and I just--" her voice quivered once more as she took another deep breath "she was so young. It never occurred to me how young she was! I just always assumed she was a  _ proper _ adult but-- but she wasn't. Was she? When she told me she missed out on High School, I didn't put much thought into why that was… maybe if she hadn't have had me-- maybe she could have gone back and gotten her diploma somehow. And now she-- and now she's dead and I don't know what I'm meant to feel about it anymore…" 

Kyo paused, waiting to see if she had anything else to say. He looked up and met her eyes as she awaited his advice. Usually she'd look away from him, but this time she met him straight on, looking as though maybe he had the answers she needed. Kyo let out another deep breath as he thought about it once more. "You're right. Your Mum was too young to have died, she should have had much longer to be with you…" he shut his eyes tight at the echoing sound of her final words cut through his mind. He couldn't leave Tohru alone though, he couldn't just let her cry, that would be just as unforgivable, right? He could sense Tohru's worry spiking up again and quickly turned around to face her properly.

"But you have to know how happy she was to have you in her life Tohru! I'm sure of that. You were her world, I-- everyone knows that. So please don't start thinking that you're the reason for any of this. Maybe she got married too young, but what does that even mean, you know? She was in love, and that's what mattered to her. So any mistakes she may or may not have made-- they're not on you. And you-- I  _ know _ how much she must have treasured you. So stop blaming yourself for everything that happened, okay?" 

Especially when all the blame fell squarely on him. 

Tohru gave a sniff and wiped at her eyes. “I’m sorry Kyo-kun, I don’t mean to be so--so down I just--” she took a deep breath as she tried to further calm herself down. She didn’t seem to be as distraught as she was earlier, it was clear that Kyo’s words had done something to soothe her anxiety but he could easily tell that this wasn’t the sort of problem that a few wise words would wash away. He tugged anxiously at the cuff of his trousers and looked up to the side “Do you-- do you want a hug… or… something?” 

He heard rather than saw Tohru’s mouth open and then clamp back shut again. “No-- no it’s okay Kyo-kun you don’t have to do anything like that, I know it’ll make you uncomfortable and you’ll transform and I know how much you hate that so--” 

Kyo turned back to face her and grabbed a hold of her flailing hands “I wouldn’t have offered if it was something I wasn’t comfortable with, alright? I know that--” he bit his lip and gave out a slightly pained noise “-- I know that hugging and stroking animals is meant to calm people down. So-- so maybe if I was a cat then-- maybe that would calm you down. Ahhh I’m so sorry!” he grouched, feeling his cheeks burn bright red and he dropped her hands like they were made of fire “I didn’t mean for that to sound so weird I mean, that’s-- that’s too far I don’t know what i was thinking. That was weird it was--” 

Tohru looked back at him with large brown eyes. He’d not really had a chance to look at them properly before, he’d always felt the need to blush and turn away before things got too awkward; but now he felt captivated by her gaze. He could see now that they weren’t a uniform colour; dark brown gave way to soft caramel. They were still red from crying, but that soft brown shone through all the brighter. She was meeting his gaze, and he thought he saw a similar recognition there, like perhaps she too was looking at him for the first time. He didn’t even notice he was back to holding her hands until he felt her thumb rubbing against his knuckles. 

“I’d like that Kyo-kun. Yes. I would like a hug, if you are willing to give it. I think that’s exactly what i need right now. If it’s not too selfish of me to ask…” 

Kyo chuckled, wiping a stray tear away with his thumb. “I told you, it’s okay to be selfish sometimes.” 

She gave him another longing look and then suddenly he felt her pull him into a tight hug. For a second he could feel her body up against his, and for just a second he was able to squeeze her back. He could feel her head nuzzle into his neck. His chin rested perfectly on top of her head, like they'd been designed as an interlocking set. For a moment, for just a single breath of clean air, Kyo felt as though he belonged. 

Then that all too familiar jolt passed through his body and the sweet scent of smoke filled his lungs. For a second he felt himself falling, but then Tohru caught him, and held him tight in her arms. She cradled him close, just like she did on that rainy day that should have been the worst night of his life, but had instead become one of his most treasured memories. He felt her tears drip onto his fur. He looked up at her, and felt his heart fill with love once more. Reaching out a paw, he gently placed it against her heart, causing her to chuckle and nuzzle into his fur once more. 

Together they shifted into a more comfortable position, Tohru’s back resting up against the headboard whilst Kyo lay down in her lap. She kept one wrapped loosely around his body and the other gently stroked his fur back and forth. He couldn’t prevent the low rumbling purr that came out of his body, and he’d be embarrassed by it if she wasn’t so obviously enthralled by him. Somehow he didn’t mind her thinking he was cute. If anybody else  _ dared _ call him cute (Shishou included) he would rip into them, but when it was Tohru… oh with Tohru it was a completely different feeling all together. 

They sat there like that in comfortable silence. Tohru’s hand never ceased its steady movement, and slowly her tears began to give way to a gentle smile once more. When he nuzzled against her stomach in appreciation, she smiled all the broader. Still they sat there, neither willing to move and break the spell. Eventually they had to though, and Tohru carefully helped back him to his room where he could transform in peace. She quickly bought his clothes, and Kyo could see the care and reverence she took in placing his beads on top of his futon. 

“Thanks.” he muttered, awkwardly walking around in a circle before planting himself next to the pile. She knelt down in front of him one last time and petted him on the head, his body instinctively leaning into the touch. 

“You’re the one I need to thank, Kyo-kun.” she smiled like the sun. “I can always rely on you to cheer me up. Thank you for always listening to me, and watching out for me. I don’t know what I’d do without you in my life.” her fingers lingered for a second longer against his face before letting go and making her way out of the room with a little bow. 

She shut the door and Kyo flung his body flat onto the futon like a particularly angry starfish. He stayed that way after he transformed back, taking a second to scream into the pillow before reaching over and putting his beads back on lest the worst happen. He’d never tested to see how long it took between transformations for his true form to reveal itself, but it wasn’t something he was willing to find out. 

He took a second to stare at his bare wrist; imagine what it might be like to live in a world where he was free from the curse and could give Tohru the life she deserved. One safe from ever having known him. 

But soon the weight of his anxiety grew too much and he hastily shoved the bracelet back on his wrist where it belonged. It felt heavier than before, a sure and certain reminder of how he was only able to live in this world due to the sacrifice of others. 

_ I’ll never forgive you. _

Kyo felt the darkness surround him again, and let himself succumb to it. 

The sound of the car. The sudden recognition _._ The panic in his heart as he knew what was going to happen. The sound of her body flying through the air and landing on the ground. The blood pooling around her lips as she uttered her final words… _I’ll never_ -

“Dinners ready!”

Tohru’s voice suddenly filtered up through the floors like a ringing gong. The ghost faded from his view, letting himself relax again. 

He’d made a selfish vow to stay by her side for as long as he was able. It went against everything her mother would have wanted for her... but Kyoko's judgement could wait. He just wanted one more year of selfishly holding her hand and letting her pour her heart out to him… one more year of caramel eyes and sunshine smiles and he’d gladly take his punishment. 

Just please let him have that at least. Let him be selfish and callous just for one more year... 

**Author's Note:**

> Enjoyed this? Let me know via Kudos/Comments or on Tumblr where I'm [Mrsmarymorstan](https://mrsmarymorstan.tumblr.com) =)


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